Expectations - Myself
By Adam Knoll | November 27, 2009 at 12:25 PM EST | No Comments
A wise man once told me that before you lay expectations upon another person, you must first be upfront, and more importantly, hold yourself to higher and harder expectations first. I will concede that last season; my expectations of myself may have been a little dodgy. I expected a ton of myself mentally and team wise (as explained by all the off-field work I did), yet where I failed myself, and my team were in two areas; in leadership and my physical self.
Do not misunderstand, I led that team, led them up, and down, and they followed and gave me everything they had. Yet I let the power struggle that occurred (between FAR more people than you’d ever believe) get to me and disrupt the team. The season was not solely my fault, as some contest to, yet I hold my fair share of the bloody 2009 Kenosha Storm carcass.
Physically, I really did work out hard over the offseason. What can be lost in my winter last year was that I just had surgery for a torn ACL in Sept, and all the time I spent working out was mostly to re-strengthen the ligament. So, in short, I showed up to our first game…well pudgy and a bit too heavy. I don’t think it dampened our attack much, yet not having the ability to scramble as much as I’d have liked to played a role I’m sure. The knee didn’t blow, and it had plenty of reason to, so I guess my conditioning was adequate. I played in all 15 games last year and barely ever stood on the sidelines. I am able to take the shots.
So, in knowing those two faults, what am I expecting of myself? Well, for starters, no internal drama and to be in better physical shape would be nice. Being the owner, with 4 of my closest guys co-owning, should stifle the drama aspect. Physically, I played in a Thanksgiving backyard type game yesterday and went without a brace for the first time since…I tore it originally back in 2003, or 2004. Wore spikes (big step up!) and caused a former teammate of mine (who hadn’t seen me play since the Gators game in August) to say after a scramble and deep td pass that, yes, indeed, it looks as if I’ve been working on my footwork. It’s a back yard game and not some team in pads we were playing, I’m aware of this, but it was a nice compliment. Two drives later I got picked by this short dude with turbo wheels and my big ass head came down from the clouds again.
What do I expect of myself this season in ways that make it harder than everyone I ask from? It’s simple, and difficult at the same time. I expect to know everything, when I say I’m the guy to go to with a question about this, or that, I expect to be ready to answer whatever may be troubling anybody. I expect to be a smart football player, not one that creates stupid turnovers and plays bad enough to lose a game by myself. I expect to control myself in a manner that speaks to my position as a player, coach, and owner. I expect to never embarrass myself with tirades when things go badly, or berate somebody over a mistake. I expect to play fairly, I wont take a cheap shot to intentionally hurt anyone.
I expect to win, I expect our offense, underneath this system, to score not so much all the time, but potently. I expect to play, win or lose, with class. I expect to give everything I have on every play, which is impossible, yet I will strive for it anyway. I expect to make the playoffs, I expect to give the entrenched hierarchy of the league fits and perhaps even have championship aspirations. I expect my play to speak for me, I will not speak to an opposing team in anger or frustration. I will not trash talk.
I expect to keep my guys safe. The worst thing in the world is hanging a receiver out to dry over the middle of the field. It’s my worst nightmare and I think about it all the time. It will happen though, football is a game by men in pads for a reason. Just know that If I throw you a ball, every effort will have been made to keep you as safe as humanly possible. I expect to call a smart game, and not let my ego dictate which plays are run and why. We will not pass extensively when the run is working; my goal here is not stats. I expect to win games even if I’ve thrown only 10 times. I expect to win if I have to throw it 30 times.
I expect to trust my guys, especially my linemen. A man who spends all day keeping people off me deserves my respect, and trust. I will not get on anyone for a missed assignment, last season was a perfect example of my loyalty to my men. I got drilled at least half the time, not once did I scream or yell at anyone. We are in this together, if we all do our jobs, we all win, if not, we all lose.
I expect to be in the best shape of my life, or perhaps my adult life. I expect to hit my receivers in stride more often. I expect to help the defense as much as I can without ever yelling ‘would you people learn how to break down and tackle?!’ again.
I expect to have fun, I expect to laugh a bit, and become closer to my guys than I did last year. I expect to hold more meetings, make sure everyone up to date, never have to explain to 4 guys in the huddle what to do, ever again. I expect to play with fire, I expect to be completely involved with everything I can. I expect to say, at the end of the year, it was worth it all, and would do it again.
I expect to stay close to my family, and my kid(s). I expect to give them the same amount of attention, if not more than what I give my team. I expect never to abandon them solely because of my personal dedication to the team, or this league. I expect to have it both ways, because I am able to handle it. If I want both, I have to create time, for both.
I expect a lot, I really do, but from none other more than myself. I expect a level of achievement higher than most, I expect integrity.
I expect greatness.
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